Benefits or love? : a micro-sociological inquiry on the formation of couple relationships played off in society

Abstract

This qualitative study explores whether single young adults base their couple relationships on love or benefits as a result of rational choice within social exchange. In an attempt to unfold this topic, the research seeks to explore which factors are given importance in a couple relationship and which characteristics an ideal partner must possess. Moreover, this research seeks to analyse how social factors are influential to individual actors when it comes to couple formation. For the nature of this study, a qualitative research design was used to co-produce and gather data from eight respondents, who participated in semi-structured, in-depth interviews. Findings suggest that people are drawn to potential partners who seemingly provide them with most benefits than costs. Trust is seen as the core element of a relationship together with shared common grounds and complementing characteristics. The respondents try not to base the potential coupling on social class, financial matters and educational background. Some participants feel discouraged and are afraid to enter into a long-term relationship which in itself seems to be in line with the concept of individualisation and pure relationships. Women give priority to the man’s character and behaviour before physical appearance. On the contrary, it is only when the woman is considered acceptable in appearance do men look for other character and behavioural traits. The male respondents think that women want a partner who is a leader and who can financially sustain the family. On the other hand, women tend to believe that men look for the physical beauty and sexual satisfaction. Although individuals are increasingly making their own choices, social factors are still considered influential during decision making.