Reconstructing a fragmented self: how LGBT Catholics negotiate a coherent sense of identity

Abstract

This paper explores how lesbian, gay, bisexual and trans (LGBT) Catholics deal with the intra-personal conflict that emerges from the incongurence between their faith and their sexuality. When they start experiencing sexual desires for persons of the same sex, their inner state of being is shattered as they are engulfed with feelings of guilt, fear, anger, doubt and anxiety. They have to deal with their apparently irreconcilable sexuality and faith as they feel judged by God and by his Church. The LGBT Catholics in my study are spiritually profound, introspective, faithful beings. Yet they are not afraid to engage with the Church’s teachings to develop their own individual morality. Drawing upon the Catholic tradition itself, they seek to develop an alternative, LGBT-affirming moral heremeutic, a process aided by therapy, reflection, prayer, priestly advice and other techniques which enable them not only to find themselves but to relocate themselves within Catholicism. Through what Foucault calls “practices of the self” such as self-reflection, self-knowledge and self-examination, individuals engage with the established and prescribed moral code in a process of “moral subjectivation”. Such processes enable them to reconstruct their fragmented self and to ‘reclaim’ their rightful place in religious texts which was denied them through heteronormative theological interpretations.