Gender equality in marriage : a myth or reality? : a case study on middle-class couples

Abstract

This qualitative study examined if gender equality in marriage is a myth or reality in view of the fact that spouses today are considered to be equal partners in marriage in the eyes of the law. Bounding this study to middle-class couples - considered to divide family work more equally than lower social classes, this case study instrumentally explored if these couples' marriages are egalitarian in practice. Data was gathered by means of in-depth semi-structured interviews with twelve married couples with school aged children. Although many couples visualized marriage equality as entailing the equal division of housework, childcare and sharing of decisions, in practice the majority of couples' marriages were more conventional - women performed the larger share of routine housework and childcare and men performed more occasional work and made more major financial decisions. Whilst some couples evenly shared some tasks and/or decisions, none of the couples shared "everything" as many had conceptualised marriage equality to be. Few couples dared to cross over into the opposite genders' boundaries and perform tasks associated with the opposite gender. Husbands and wives' traditional ideologies, presence of children, time availability and constraints, and men's greater relative resources emerged as possible factors impeding the attainment of gender equality in marriage for most couples. Lack of discourse on sharing prior marriage, maternal gatekeeping and economics of gratitude seem to be intertwining internal processes limiting the possibility for couples to share more family work. Although couples seemed satisfied with their current division of labour and many believed it was fair there are consequences for couples living in unequal relationships