Communication pitfalls between husbands and wives

Abstract

"Through talk we create and shape our relationships. Through talk we are comforted; through talk we are hurt" (Tannen, 2002: Preface xiii) Communication, be it verbal or non-verbal, is a necessity in our daily lives, but how often do we examine whether what we say can create some sort of conflict or miscommunication? How do men and women interrelate, especially as husband and wife? Research has shown that the way men and women communicate, sometimes referred to as "cross-cultural communication'', can be a cause of miscommunication because of their different styles of conversation. This dissertation, though a small-scale qualitative study, explores the talking styles of men and women and whether it is because of these styles that conflicts arise. Some researchers, such as Tannen (1991, 1992) and Maltz and Borker (1982), argue that it is the way that boys and girls grow up in a different world of words, which creates the different conversational styles. Four married couples of different age groups have been interviewed, with the aim of investigating whether it is these different styles that are a cause of miscommunication between males and females in their interpersonal relationships. Of course, men and women are biologically different, and it has been proved that their brains are wired differently. As such, disparities in conversational styles are not the result of socialization only. Obviously the result of this research depends on other variables, such as the age of participants, as was found in a recent study in Malta in Sciriha (2005).