Attachment, socialization and social skills : parents' legacy to their children

Abstract

This study acknowledged the fact that social skills are indispensable for children to develop satisfying relationships not only in their present but also for their future relationships. Recognizing parents as significant figures in a child's development, it aimed to explore what processes there are in the parent-child relationship, what functions parents play in the development of their children's social and skills and finally, how important they are for this development. The literature review identified attachment and socialization as the main means through which the development of moral skills, communication skills, social understanding and social empathy occur. A qualitative methodology approach was taken and 16 in-depth interviews were done with young adults aged between 18 and 24 coming from various backgrounds and interests. Respondents were accessed through snowballing method and participation was on voluntary basis. The in-depth interview consisted of a short questionnaire, two vignettes and an interview schedule. Results deriving from the data collection showed that parents' constant availability contributed to respondent's perception of their parents as being a safe base, even so constant availability also ensue some dependence on parents. How parents view the world, how they perceived their children's capability to cope with life and how they tre~ted their children through different kinds of messages they present to their children seem to affect internal working models of the world and self. Children evaluate parent's qualities, thus they decide in what to imitate their parents and what not. Reasoning as a discipline technique seemed to be the most effective to help in the development of social skills. Friends also seem to have an impact on social skills development. Findings also suggest that communications have an important role in delivering a sense of security and socializing children. Thus, all this concludes that because parents provide attachment and socialization, possibly they are the only system that can cater adequately for social skills development. The quality of the parent-child relationship seems to be an important factor in determining development of social skills. Children who did not have a constant good relationship with their parents, since social skills development is a learning process, other positive relationships and social networks can help.